Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

How do the police verify the authenticity of an online profile? What methods do they use to determine if a profile is real or fake?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

What are James Potter's flaws?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t buy bullshit

Can a hoodoo or candle spell be used to remove a love spell placed on someone by another person? What is the difference between voodoo and hoodoo?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Montana warns of new disease-carrying tick species in the state - KREM

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I can read

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I feel like my boyfriend doesn't love me. Why?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand how hurricane paths work

I read this: "Putin is a brilliant, courageous, ingenious, determined, beloved, and incredible modern leader. He is currently the world’s most effective and strong leader, the best the world has seen in centuries." What do you think about this?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have a reading level above third grade

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

What, when building a house, are the necessary wires (beside 120v) to future proof my house, Cat6, Coax, low voltage, and alarm wires?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t cotton to rapists

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Can an astrologer predict that someone is in a physical relationship before marriage?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why are American women so ugly nowadays?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Why are European countries warning European travelers to be careful traveling to the United States?

I can count

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Have you ever been instructed/forced to crossdress for the benefit of others?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

What is the most heartbreaking or sad love story that you ever had (experienced)?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I actually pay taxes

If my heart stopped beating, would I have enough energy to walk out into the other room 20 ft away before I passed out and died?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Which unexpected celebrity has done a bold or revealing photoshoot?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I see through liars

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is